Jonny Greenwood’s Report Card?

by Jonathan on March 14, 2011

While going through a bunch of old files tonight, I came across this scan of a report card supposedly belonging to Jonny Greenwood. This was sent to us almost 10 years ago by someone who apparently knew the teacher. It could totally be fake, though. ย Anyone want to take a stab at figuring it out what it says?

Jonny Greenwood's Report Card?

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  • JoeM

    From what I can make out Im pretty sure that Johnny is better suited as a musician than a professional French speaker

  • phil

    effort grade for years work: ( <– a long sad face

  • bcpk

    Jonathan’s again revealed familiar weaknesses: while he has some good ideas, these are virtually obscured by a combination of poor planning and linguistic errors. Both in the two essays and in the Reading Comprehension, grammatical slips abounded. He must learn a range of useful idioms and some binding vocabulary to give an authentic flavour to his writing; and he must check carefully what he has written. His comprehension and pronunciation also remain poor: he should be working intensively on these in the coming months, but he, for his part, mus apply himself with real enthusiasm. He is still too much inclined to be passive, if not absent.

  • kate

    wow me and jonny share so much things in common!

  • Muldfeld

    Thank you for typing that out. I could barely read the report card at all.

  • Tchocky

    Thank you bcpk, you have the amazing ability to read such harsh reports on Jonny’s French! Oh well, perhaps it was best that Jonny dropped out and into Radiohead, he wouldn’t of gotten anywhere doing averagely in school. Let this be a lesson to you children, you have to go to school, but if you don’t, you become rich and get to be Bill Gates or something! :))

  • Daniel

    I love the last bit …. it’s like a record of Kid A (or any of their albums, really) being born in this long-term, cosmological sense.

  • Opaquiosq

    I’m guessing that Colin’s report was much better. He’s a known French speaker (even if a bit wobbly in Meeting People is Easy).


    This sounds similar to some of the early fan reviews of TKOL.

  • The Toy

    …and he is gay

  • Anonymous

    Love this report card. I suppose it could be a fake but even if it is, it’s real enough to be representative of what he might have got ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • Calm Before The Storm

    Well I can’t really be bothered with spanish myself…. I’d rather be doing English history art or music ๐Ÿ™‚

  • mrk

    I went to abingdon and the card certainly looks right – can’t recognise the teachers initals though…

  • “Jonathan”! That’s so sweet!

  • Ginge125

    It’s genuine enough.

    WHZ – Dr. W Hubert Zawadzki (top right, bottom left) was his form tutor.

    Teacher signed, bottom left, R C R Milner, housemaster and French teacher.

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